Princess Leia - Came over her fear of loneliness and learnt to love herself

Talk. Detox. Repeat.

Princess Leia - Zoya Khan
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September 11, 2021

Do you ever feel like talking about everything that bothers you but don't know who would like to take precious time out of their day to truly listen? Do you feel bottled up with emotions aplenty, but find no comfortable outlet to express them? Or are you so overwhelmed that you've become numb and don't even know you need to talk to someone?

Pata nahi! Whatever stage you're in...it's never too late to just relax your jaws, warm up your vocal cords and use words as a medium to share the whirlwind that's stirring up inside you. I tried it recently and it worked wonders. I was apprehensive, I didn't want to reveal some personal, vulnerable thoughts and patterns but I did. And trust me...it worked. It's simpler than I expected. At the end of the day, it's just plain ol' talking. Something we never stopped ourselves from doing as children. So why now?

Life, especially as an adult, is a rollercoaster ride. Sometimes you’re scared, sometimes you’re ecstatic. These highs and lows are a natural part of life. We often think others might not understand or relate to our dreadful lows, but one heart-to-heart conversation can prove just the opposite. If only we had more open discussions about these dips in our mood, energy and motivation; instead of keeping it all buried deep inside our souls. It all adds up. The suppressed emotions let themselves out in difficult ways. Why let them swell up, when we can release them often, or even daily?

Hmm. There is one hitch. Our friends and family are not available on a daily basis to lend their ears and hearts to all our dilemmas. Sometimes we ourselves are tired of being the patient, designated listener to our loved ones. Phir kahaan jaayein? A visit to a therapist everyday would be a big burn in our wallets. If only we could all afford it but it's not possible for many.  

Well, we have some solutions for you:

  • Add talking with loved ones to your weekly routine:
    We add dinner parties, movie night and whatnot to our routine to catch up with our loved ones. Why not make talking sessions a norm too? Once a week, you and your loved one/s get together to be not just your fun self but your fragile, deep, real self. Have a real talk - the kind of talk that accepts all kinds of emotions and not just the pleasant ones.

    Me: Maa, Sunday ko acche se baith ke aap se baat karna hai. Agar main ro loon toh ghabra mat jaana.

    Maa: Arre? Kyun royegi?!

    Me: Rona bhi achha hai. Normal hai. Get used to it. Okay? Please.

    Maa: Okay. :) See you on Sunday.
  • Join a group of people with similar interests:
    If you love books or dance or mathematics or nature or whatnot, you'll always find other people who love it too. Be it a book club, a dance workshop, a math appreciation club...you never know where you find like-minded people. And without even trying, you may end up bonding with someone (or an entire group) who respects and admires you because you're both alike, and vice versa. Conversations with like-minded people always end up being relatable and meaningful.
    I did an improv comedy workshop recently and apart from all the laughing and hilarity, I discussed sadness with them. And how laughter is so important and sometimes we forget to laugh. Sometimes...it's good to get out of our heads, see problems as jokes and make merry. When I told them this, they all started sharing their sadness and tough days and said that they really needed this too. In one minute, we all became friends.

  • Engage in conversations with complete strangers:
    It may seem strange but strangers make for great listeners! They help us lose all inhibitions. We both know our time together is temporary so discussing anything under the sun happens with barely any judgments or shame. It's very therapeutic. If you're an introvert, you might find this bizarre but hey, I'm an introvert (on most days) and I can swear by this.
    While eating a snack and watching the birds in the park (something I've started doing recently during the pandemic), a man hesitantly came up to me while keeping a 2 meter distance. He said he noticed how the birds are so close to my feet, they seem comfortable around me. That got us talking about nature and species. Next thing I know, we're talking about our families, our obsessions, our disappointments and regrets, our coping mechanisms. Yeah...that happened! I guess I'm manifesting opportunities to talk more (and so can you)!
  • Give Jumping Minds a try:
    At the moment, all over the world, many of us are still facing the repercussions of a pandemic. Meeting people, especially strangers, is difficult if not impossible. Hey...don't worry. We have one more quick solution. Jump into our app and chat to some relevant, relatable peers. They're waiting. :)

    Download the App now!!

I've been using it for a while now and it releases so much tension inside me. I go about my day a little better after speaking to a fellow peer. I'm so glad I can do this...can't believe this didn't exist before!

So what are you waiting for? Pick at least one of the solutions above, speak your heart out, let someone into your soul and lift your spirits. You are never alone. It all starts with silence and ends with silence. But what happens in between is the easiest smoothest most natural form of therapy. Allow yourself a catharsis, allow yourself to be heard. You deserve to be listened to. You deserve to talk.

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